stories in and

The Trouble with Prophecies

The Trouble with Prophecies by Jake Joy

The heroes of old are gone and the world of Feydern has fallen into darkness. With the prophesised Chosen One missing, Feydern’s only hope lies with Derrick, the Last Wizard, but he doesn’t want to help. In his opinion, tracking down the missing Chosen One is an idiotic idea that will get them all killed. But prophecies must come true and despite his best efforts, he’s dragged along on the quest. Bandits, goblins, and warring grannies stand in the way of his freedom, but he finds his greatest obstacle is destiny itself. That’s the trouble with prophecies... They don’t really give you a choice.


Kill All The Dogs

Kill All The Dogs by Rick Berry

Are we defined by the things that happen to us, or the things we make happen to others? Ten-year-old Nathan Hyde is playing in a tree house, when he witnesses a vicious attack on his best friend’s younger sisters. Life is never the same again. Many years later, Nathan finds himself in the lower reaches of a government department, when an opportunity to confront his demons and enact revenge presents itself. A mystery illness is taking hold in the population, at the very moment a scheming, attention-seeking politician becomes Nathan’s new boss. It can’t happen, can it? In the farcical world of politics, anything is possible. Nathan Hyde is going to kill all the dogs. Part psychological drama, part political satire, Kill All The Dogs is the story of how of a personal trauma becomes twisted into a national tragedy.


The Weird & Unexpected World of Ronald Taylor

The Weird & Unexpected World of Ronald Taylor by Jack T Canis

Recently retired, Ronald Taylor worried about his future, stuck in his bungalow w his wife of 40yrs. Then he encounters a Brownie relieving itself in his hedge. And he was worried he was going to be bored!


They Ate The Waitress?

They Ate The Waitress? by D.N. Schmidt

A delightfully funny murder mystery full of wit, wordplay, and cannibalism. Nick Wergild is a private detective armed only with his wits and an atomic-powered electroshock gun. One evening, while under the influence of powerful hallucinogens, he is hired to investigate a murder at a local restaurant called “Hand to Mouth”. It seems the customers ate one of the staff. And she didn’t even volunteer for the job.Nick has to find a way to solve the case without a body or a crime scene. Along the way, he also has to survive hit men, bomb-throwing security guards, bad puns, and a homicidal politician. Will he live long enough to solve the case? Can you really trust the owner of a restaurant for cannibals? What does human flesh really taste like? And why does furniture keep falling from the sky? If you love humor, mysteries, and anything weird, you don't want to miss this!


Hell Hath No Fury

Hell Hath No Fury by David Dixon

A terrifying figure known as The Pale Man has emerged from Carla's past to offer Snake and the boss a sadistic choice: find Carla and bring her to him or lose the Black Sun 490 forever. Snake and the boss have had their squabbles before, but this time they're playing for keeps. The boss can't bear to lose the ship, and Snake won't turn Carla over to The Pale Man, no matter the cost. When a bar fight between the two ends with pistols and blades drawn, they part ways, and it's a race to see who can get to Carla first. But they aren't the only ones involved. On the boss's side, a UNF covert ops team with a penchant for pulling triggers first and asking questions later, and in Snake's corner, a religious cult that holds the clues he needs to reach Carla. Both sides are racing to find her and it will come down to who is willing to shoot first. Snake and the boss may have quick trigger fingers, but will they be able to pull them when they're staring down the sights at each other? In the end, it's Carla's shocking secret that will set them all on course for a violent conclusion that may not leave anybody standing in... Hell Hath No Fury.


Six-Gun Shuffle

Six-Gun Shuffle by David Dixon

Snake and the boss have made a lot of enemies, but up until their trip to Yaeger, they’ve never had any beef with Michael Ver, the galaxy’s most bankable popstar—mainly because they hadn’t met him before. After the boss teaches Ver a lesson about the difference between looking tough and being tough, he finds himself a minor viral video star and catches the eye of a gorgeous redhead named Kell. Things are looking up. That is, until Kell goes missing and the boss goes after her. After a shootout with Ver’s crew, things go from bad to worse—nobody can find Ver, and Snake and the boss are the prime suspects in his disappearance. The next thing they know they’ve got a bounty on their heads and hardly a friend in sight. Carla and Kell are the only people they can count on, but has Kell been playing a different game all along? It’s a mixed-up tale of bounty hunters, crooked cops, popstars and
 insurance agents?... in Six-Gun Shuffle.


Dojakai: The BrixCity A.C.T - Cloutless

Dojakai: The BrixCity A.C.T - Cloutless by Cordell Charles

In a world where competition is everything, and notoriety, is considered currency. Dojakai tells the story of Auraluke, a 13 year old boy, raised just outside of society’s logic. Born in seclusion with only his father’s guidance; Auraluke has been training his entire life, without the treasures of fame and glory. But this world is different. The world was also once plagued by beasts, born from the stars; known as Dojakai. Hip to the world, but forbidden from participating in society’s politics, Auraluke longs to find his place between mind, body and his own sense of will. Who is his father? Why has he been training him in seclusion? ..What the heck is Clout? Adventure awaits, in this introduction to the series. Dojakai: The BrixCity Sagas
 Book 1


Moon City Vice

Moon City Vice by C.T. Phipps

"Welcome to the Moon!" Neal Gordon and his partners, former actress Lucy Westenra and intelligent canine Barksley, are in hot water with Cyberlife after a bust goes disastrously wrong. Put on what is likely to be permanent suspension, they receive a job offer to work for EarthGov directly. Unfortunately, EarthGov is hiring them because they know a catastrophic plague is about to be unleashed throughout the Moon's neighborhood. Neal finds himself trying to unravel a conspiracy involving poisoned narcotics, a sham church founded by humans from another planet, and a mysterious woman from his past that he was sure had died. Enjoy this latest satirical entry in the Moon Cops series that is already a best-selling new entry in the Futurepunk universe (Agent G, Cyber Dragons, Space Academy) by C. T. Phipps!


Moon Cops on the Moon

Moon Cops on the Moon by C.T. Phipps

"Welcome to the moon!" Neal Gordon screwed up his assignment on Mars and they reassigned him to Antarctica. Now he's being reassigned some place even worse: Luna City. A crime ridden hellhole with a super-rich ruling class, he almost immediately finds himself targeted by bounty hunters and cyborg terrorists. Thankfully, Neal has an unusual set of partners in robot dog, Barksley, and the snarky but badass Lucy Westenra. Yes, make all the vampire jokes you want. It's tough being a corporate cop on humanity's foremost colony and before this adventure is over, he's going to have to deal with deranged influencers, mysterious female secret agents, and a 1970s themed flying car called the Purple Rain. Can he survive to get reassigned? Who knows. MOON COPS ON THE MOON is set in the Futurepunk setting of Agent G, the Cyber Dragons Trilogy, and Space Academy novels but functions as a standalone series. It is a humorous action-filled romp that fans of The Expanse, Robocop, Demolition Man, and Blade Runner will enjoy.


#Rehashed

#Rehashed by Jack T Canis

#Rehashed: A short story collection, contains twenty short stories from the deviant mind of Jack T. Canis. They range from the humorous to the bizarre, dark to enlightening. Fourteen rehashed stories have been previously published in journals, magazines and anthologies from the USA, UK & France and collected together into a single volume. There are also six new tales for your delectation: The Doldrums of Bidmouth Bay; Oliver's Island; The Waiting Room; Bolivia; Chutzpah & Fly Spray.


Cultural Practices of the Heartland

Cultural Practices of the Heartland by Andy C.F. Crawford

SPSFC 2023

Deep within the suburban jungle of Cincinnati, a monster has emerged, bursting out of the Rumpke Sanitary Landfill. Taking its name from its birthplace, Rumpke is a thousand feet tall, has revolting personal habits, and might be vaguely familiar to readers, considering his orange-tinged hair and proportionally tiny hands. What do Americans do when such a creature appears, lumbers around at random, and occasionally defiles a local landmark? For millions, the choice is obvious – worship it.New York journalist Fred Millard is assigned to report on the exploits of the monster, his bizarre fandom, and the ludicrous internet conspiracy theories that have caught fire since his appearance. Fred quickly learns that the absurdity of Rumpke’s fandom leads to more serious consequences than mere internet hysteria – when serious illness starts to spread in those closest to the monster, its biggest fans refuse to follow the government’s guidance of masking and social distancing, worsening the outbreak. And most appalling of all, one conspiracy theory inspires a violent mob to assemble in Washington, DC and assault a federal building, with deadly results.A funhouse-mirror reflection of modern American politics, CULTURAL PRACTICES OF THE HEARTLAND is a sci-fi tinged political satire novel. It was written for all of us who are exhausted, baffled, and even terrified by the insanity of American politics in recent times.


The Odyssey of Fletcher

The Odyssey of Fletcher by Erik Dargitz

After a global virus seemingly wipes out the entire male population, a skinny, socially awkward, self-conscious video game junkie is somehow still kicking. And he's wildly unprepared for this new world. Out there waiting for him are physicians who want to study him, a cult of spiritual extremists who want to deify him and brutal gangs with far more nefarious intentions. Throughout his journey, Fletcher does his best to act like a real man, being that he's the only one around. Unfortunately, this only leads to more problems ... for him and humanity.


Babies with Rabies: An ABC Survival Guide

Babies with Rabies: An ABC Survival Guide by L. A. Cunningham

R is for rabies. Of COURSE it’s for rabies! Your most imminent threat is BABIES WITH RABIES! It’s a post-apocalyptic world, and hordes of feral, teething babies are foaming at the mouth and roaming the streets looking for their next victim. You completed your training montage, you know how to sew fingers back on, you studied their weaknesses, and now there’s only one thing left to do: survive! **BABIES WITH RABIES is the perfect gift for parents
or people who hate babies!**


TREBLE: THE RHYTHM WITHIN

TREBLE: THE RHYTHM WITHIN by Dre "DaBrute" Daniels

A mysterious virus has taken Washington D.C by storm! The city is in a panic and has gone crazy. A high school student named Zamir Green has been exposed to the virus and his body begins to mutate. It seems like music is triggering something deep down within him! What in the world is going on!? This series is an action drama/musical. Throughout the series our main character will discover that he has gained the ability to gain a different super power based on the genre he listens to. The powers are based on the emotional/stereotypical response that people in our world have toward particular genres of music. A mysterious virus has taken Washington D.C by storm! The city is in a panic and has gone crazy. A high school student named Zamir Green has been exposed to the virus and his body begins to mutate. It seems like music is triggering something deep down within him! What in the world is going on!? This series is an action drama/musical. Throughout the series our main character will discover that he has gained the ability to gain a different super power based on the genre he listens to. The powers are based on the emotional/stereotypical response that people in our world have toward particular genres of music.


Spaceman Steve and the Quest for the Awesome Artifact

Spaceman Steve and the Quest for the Awesome Artifact by Joel N. Cooper

Spaceman Steve is pretty sure he's in the wrong story. Steve knows he is a character in a fictional book, but he believes he should be in space killing aliens instead of fighting fire-breathing dragons, crossing enchanted rivers, and being thrown into dungeons. He finds himself in a medieval fantasy world, despite his high-tech space suit. Steve discovers the backpack he's wearing is magical, as he often pulls out objects that may or may not be helpful. The queen of Chradaria believes he is a wizard, so she brings him on her quest to find an artifact of great importance that could save her kingdom. Zab, a neighboring king who happens to be immortal, has a long history of doing whatever it takes to expand his borders. He sends his army into Chradaria, and the queen believes he will soon attack the capital city in an attempt to conquer her kingdom. As she fears for the safety of her people, the queen and Steve set off on a quest to steal the golden amulet that provides Zab with his immortality. Steve seeks to help the queen on her quest, while also mocking the author for his lazy writing.


The Book and the Blade

The Book and the Blade by A.B. Finlayson

A perfect story for fans of Gaiman and Pratchett’s GOOD OMENS, SHAUN OF THE DEAD and THE WORLD’S END. Arthur Crazy is drunk and seeing ghosts. This is not a metaphor. The dead are walking and talking, and it doesn't matter that Arthur doesn't believe in them. They believe in him. Too drunk to recall how he stumbled upon his nascent power, Arthur is burdened with newfound he’s the only one who can hear the unfinished business of every dead guy in York, and he’s the only one who can help. As forgotten legends and lost demons stir all over the cobbled streets and snickelways, Arthur finds himself at the centre of an unfolding mystery—a light in the desert, a fart at a funeral—and he is about to discover that an unfortunate surname isn't the only thing that makes him stand out. Arthur just wants to sober up, have a kebab, and go home, but his conscience is knocking loud and clear, demanding he open the damn door. He may not be the hero the dead need, but he’s the one they’re stuck with. Besides, one of those ghosts seems kind of cute.


Misadventurous Episode One

Misadventurous Episode One by Shawn Drew

SFINCS

Adventuring looks so easy on paper, but in the real world, well
 MISADVENTUROUS is a series of fantasy-comedy novellas where adventuring is big business and accidentally burning down towns is just another day on the job. Beden spent his entire childhood dreaming about becoming an adventurer, just like his hero, Proper John Gallant. When he left home and crossed paths with a mysterious warrior and a sometimes-competent wizard, he was sure he was on the right path. But adventuring is a tough business, and skeletons come in hordes, so now he’s more unsure than ever about his future. Jyden set out on her own, adventuring to prove that she wasn’t just a product of her upbringing. The group she found was with a pair of strange siblings and a misplaced, somewhat forgettable pirate, but she figured her natural skills would pull them through. But the adventuring world is a harsh one, and a few mistakes have her questioning her choices. Together, these two mismatched groups have to learn that to make a group more than the sum of its parts, it takes more than just a small failure in math. And unbeknownst to them all, forces are in play that will drag them, sometimes kicking and screaming, into the fate of the world itself.


Not Your Mountain

Not Your Mountain by Greg Yates / AJ Alexanders

He wanted to be an adventurer, but adventure could cost him his home. Matty has spent his whole life working in the mines, it's all he's ever known to do: sing to the stone, extract its riches, and learn its properties. But after an unexpected visit from a dwarven adventurer, his life takes a seismic shift. Dwarves never leave Craig'n Dell and guests never visit, but now Matty wants to change all of that. With his cunning, bravery, and will, Matty sets off with his left foot forward... and stumbles. Join Matty as he embarks on a comedic fantasy adventure meant to captivate and amuse; where monsters, adventure, and unlikely companionship await!


The Erstwhile Tyler Kyle

The Erstwhile Tyler Kyle by Steve Hugh Westenra

Tyler Kyle doesn’t believe in monsters. A washed-up thirty-year-old actor and reluctant cryptid investigator, Tyler is used to playing the Scully to his best friend Josh’s Mulder on their stupidly popular YouTube channel. But when Tyler receives previously unseen footage of the B movie bombshell mother who abandoned him eighteen years ago—footage linked to an isolated island in the Canadian wilderness—the mystery is one conspiracy he’s determined to investigate. The fact that following the scent gives Tyler an excuse to run away from the “straight” Josh, whom he drunkenly made out with, is just the cherry on the shit sundae. But Echo Island isn’t what it seems. Its eerily scenic veneer hides a twisted secret buried in its roots as a gay conversion camp, and as Tyler retraces his mother’s footsteps, he discovers a supernatural connection between the residents and the island—one they seem to think Tyler and his mother share. Even worse, the footage of Tyler’s mom came from someone on the island–a stalker whose obsessive fascination with both Tyler and Josh is about to make Tyler wish he hadn’t gone this one alone. Puppeteered by his stalker, searching for his mother, and debating whether it’s possible to queerbait yourself, Tyler comes to realize that it doesn’t matter so much whether you believe in monsters, if they believe in you. THE ERSTWHILE TYLER KYLE is an adult horror comedy for fans of GHOST FILES, BUZZFEED UNSOLVED, and TWIN PEAKS.


Query

Query by Zilla Novikov

City planner by day, tired climate activist by day off, aspiring writer Zilla Novikov’s query letters quickly devolve into a darkly funny exploration of her own psyche. As the rejections pile up, her novel blurbs and biographies grow increasingly unhinged, while Zilla discovers that the road to bestseller-dom is paved with neoliberal hellscapes.


Dead Sexy

Dead Sexy by Cameo MacPherson

A light-hearted and lightly steamy fantasy/paranormal romance.... because sometimes falling in love can be harder than hunting the undead. Cassie Jones, the head of Jones' Post-Mortem Tracking Agency, has been cursed with a capital "C." Thanks to an unfortunate incident with an angry wizard, any guy she falls for is guaranteed to betray her. So when David MacDuff - the most mouthwatering man she's ever had the misfortune to meet - hires her to track his recently deceased brother, Gideon, she knows she's got to keep things strictly professional. Yeah, like that's gonna happen. Maybe she should have stuck to hunting vampires after all.


The Acorn Stories

The Acorn Stories by Duane Simolke

Visit the West Texas town of Acorn! Enjoy the German festival, a high school football game, homemade apple pie from the Turner Street CafĂ©, and the cool shade of a hundred-year-old oak tree. Meet dedicated teachers, unusual artists, shrewd business owners, closeted gays, and concerned neighbors. See how lives become intertwined in moments of humor or tragedy. Just be careful, because in Acorn, the sky is always falling! From romantic comedy to razor-sharp satire to moments of quiet reflection, Duane Simolke’s award-winning tales transform a fictional West Texas town into a tapestry of human experiences. “A lush tangle of small-town life branches out in this engrossing collection of short stories.” –Kirkus Reviews “The ability to depict such a wide cross section of humanity, including details of each character’s breadth of knowledge and experience, takes a talented, insightful author, and Duane Simolke is such a writer.” –E. Conley, Betty’s Books


TOM

TOM by Dave Freer

Tom is a cat in trouble. The worst possible kind of trouble: he’s been turned into a human. Transformed by an irascible old magician in need of a famulus -- a servant and an assistant, Tom is as good at being a servant as a cat ever is. The assistant part is more to Tom’s taste: he rather fancies impressing the girl cats and terrorizing the other toms by transforming himself into a tiger. But the world of magic, a vanished and cursed princess, and a haunted skull, and a demon in the chamber-pot, to say nothing of conspiring wizards and the wickedest witch in the west, all seem to be out to kill Tom. He is a cat coming to terms with being a boy, dealing with all this. He has a raven and a cheese as
 sort of allies. And of course there is the princess. If you were looking for ‘War and Peace’ this is the wrong book for you. It’s a light-hearted and gently satirical fantasy, full of terrible puns and
 cats.


Path of Simon: Book One of the Infernal Jest

Path of Simon: Book One of the Infernal Jest by Thomas Marlowe

Does power ever bow to the human constructs of good and evil or it simply obeys the hand that wields it? Afraid for his niece, gravedigger Tim Stockton goes against everything he believes in to help his brother-in-law settle a debt with the mob by stealing jewelry from a deceased rap star’s grave. But in that coffin Tim finds more than he bargained for. Trapped inside a ruby, an ancient power awakens from its slumber and possesses the gravedigger, leading him straight to the dungeon of the Order of Simon. There, plagued by the constant jabbering of his demonic captor and its cries of innocence echoing off the moldy walls, Tim must decide whether he will undertake the Path of Simon for the salvation of his soul and the future of the world as demonic legions from the pits of Hell seek to stake a claim for the entity within the gravedigger. With the aid of the inquisitors of the Order and unexpected allies from the worlds beyond, will Tim find strength to contain the power within and silence the rising doubts in his quest? Or will he falter and bring doom upon the humankind?


Shithole USA

Shithole USA by Mark Zirbel

A syphilitic plague has ravaged the Sunshine State, transforming its residents into sex-crazed mutants. All is well, however, within the World Village, a walled-in retirement paradise that stretches across central Florida. But something stinks in the World Village-literally. The seniors have started worshipping their excrement. Enter Hank Shatley, a retired police detective with an unnatural fear of feces. To repay a life debt, Hank must go undercover in the World Village to investigate Alfred Peora, the community's enigmatic leader. Hank's fate is linked with that of Ryan Herro, a corporate lackey whose mother has fallen under Peora's spell. As Hank and Ryan's stories converge, the universe begins to unravel. Realities collide. Hell invades Earth. And at the center of it all is a mysterious young woman with a purple mohawk and unimaginable powers. Mark Zirbel, the Wonderland Award-nominated author of Cyberpunk Zombie Jihad, takes you through a cyberpunk-bizarro world filled with turd terrorists, nanite technology, corporate Satanism, shit golems, a syndicate of supervillains, bickering puppets, and an alien city modeled after 1980s crime movies. When you're on a journey like this, be sure to book your stopover in Shithole USA.


The Royal Matchmaking Competition: Princess Qloey

The Royal Matchmaking Competition: Princess Qloey by Zoiy G. Galloay

One princess searching for her prince charming. Twelve princes, dukes, elves, and a commoner, competing for the princess’s heart. One assassin among the bachelors, plotting to kill the princess and bring the empire to its knees. Warning: this fantasy romance contains dangerously hot princes, sexy elves, and a heart-throbbing peasant. Read at your own risk!


Escape From Samsara: A Dark Comedy Fantasy Adventure (Prophecy Allocation)

Escape From Samsara: A Dark Comedy Fantasy Adventure (Prophecy Allocation) by Nicky Blue

"Tear-inducingly funny and impossible to put down!" (OVER 100 FIVE STAR REVIEWS ACROSS AMAZON AND GOODREADS!) A fatal mistake catapults Barry Harris into the adventure of a lifetime. With talking hedges, samurai ghosts, meddling psychotherapists, and an inexplicably non-linear time pattern conspiring against him, Barry must do battle to save his hide, unleash the ninja within, and rescue his father from an ancient army, a dark sorcerer and a raging inferno.


Hacking George

Hacking George by Bob Palmer

Playing God is a dangerous game, even if you do write the rules and think they’re pretty neat. Following a road-rage incident in which he was the victim, middle-aged cynic George Sanderson has an epiphany. He believes he has the power to influence fate and set the world to rights. During a meticulously-planned intervention to help his friend Angela Hayworth, the two fall in love. George’s lonely existence looks set to improve. But he’s about to discover that playing games with people’s lives is fraught with danger. And when his life starts to fall apart, he’s forced to confront the frightening truth
 Someone is manipulating him. But why? With his freedom and sanity at stake, George must fight for everything he holds dear – especially his lawn, his meat thermometer, and Angela’s perfect teeth. Perfect for fans of Fredrik Backman, Graeme Simsion, Richard Osman, and Jonas Jonasson, Hacking George will put a smile on your face and a tear in your eye as it drives you towards its startling end. Editorial review "Not To Be Missed. If ever proof were needed that a good book doesn’t need a tortuously complicated plot, a high body count and gratuitous sex and violence then this is it." – Reedsy Discovery


Invention Is a Mother

Invention Is a Mother by Rob Brownell

RESPONSIBILITY IS OVERRATED. A recently graduated and happily unemployed engineer, Shaughnessy shirks responsibility whenever possible. He coasts through life, sidestepping every opportunity to follow in his father Walton’s footsteps, until Walton begins to suspect that he has MFD (Mysterious Fatal Disease). The family coerces Shaughnessy to impersonate his father as a senior engineer at Critical Think Inc. There, he is immediately entangled in the development of an irrational consumer product. Pressured to innovate in the face of absurd challenges and fantastical demands, Shaughnessy teeters on the edge between breakthrough and breakdown. In a near future where you are what you wear, can an idling young engineer successfully navigate corporate startup culture, accept his family’s medical crisis, and harness his full creative potential? Fans of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and Good Omens will enjoy laugh-out-loud collisions with the limits of reason in Invention Is a Mother.


Thirteenth

Thirteenth by C.M Rosens

Lovecraftian horror meets kitchen sink drama in this dry, darkly funny tale of toxic families, killers and cannibals, eldritch body horror and antihero female rage. ~ Katy Porter is the thirteenth child of a thirteenth child in an inbred family of eldritch horrors, and her own eventual metamorphosis will change her into a creature that hungers for her family's flesh. To some, she's a threat - to others, a weapon. Katy needs allies to help her control her Changes, but she's stuck with her oldest brother, a drug-addled playboy who voted to have her killed but is chaotic enough to have genuinely changed his mind, and her eyeball-eating, god-like cousin, whose idea of protecting her involves abduction, dark rituals, and encouraging her homicidal side. If anyone is going to survive Katy's transformation, scores need to be settled and fears need to be faced - and Katy is not the only one who needs to face them. THIRTEENTH is an eldritch family drama with a Lovecraftian twist on HANNIBAL RISING meets FEAR AND LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS, set it in East Sussex. Content Warnings for drug use, self harm, suicide ideation, incest, violence, gore, body horror, and strong language. Adult Horror. Full list of CWs can be found on its product page at cmrosens.com.


Norse Mythology for Bostonians: A Transcription of the Impudent Edda

Norse Mythology for Bostonians: A Transcription of the Impudent Edda by Rowdy Geirsson

Norse Mythology for Bostonians is a humorous retelling of the trials and tribulations of Odin, Thor, and the other Norse gods. Regarded as an authentic, new "Edda" (as the original Icelandic source material is called), the main narrative is told in the charmingly quaint dialect of a foul-mouthed Bostonian. New mythological episodes, such as Thor's attempt to renew his driver's license and Odin's mysterious journey to Boston Common, supplement the more traditional stories such as Odin's acquisition of the mead of poetry and the theft of Idunn's apples of youth. Substantial historical background information about the myths is provided in the introductory material, as well as in the footnotes that occur throughout the volume. Based on the long-running McSweeney's Internet Tendency column Norse History for Bostonians, Norse Mythology for Bostonians, introduces readers to a fresh, new perspective on both familiar and previously unknown narratives of Norse mythology.


The Chronicles of Spoony, Vols. 1-3

The Chronicles of Spoony, Vols. 1-3 by Jim Larsen

Spoony is a kid with a heart of gold. He loves hugs, he loves affection, and he values friendship and family. But there is something about him that isn’t quite right. He can’t kick a ball, he can’t play Duck Duck Goose, and he confuses regular people for clowns. He thinks a fictitious character on an old TV show is his dad, and he just has a general way of ruining things for other people while remaining blissfully unaware. His mom isn’t much better. Embarrassed by the drunken one-night stand that created Spoony, she has perpetrated numerous lies to save face and avoid humiliation over the truth that Spoony’s father real father is the lanky Burt Peppermill, and that an overindulgence of lime flavored Jell-O shooters led her to lower her standards enough to let him touch her in that way. All her lies, however, come crashing down on them both the day Spoony finally kicks a ball in P.E. class, resulting in a trip to the emergency room where a number of surprises await. The Chronicles of Spoony, Vols. 1-3 offer delightfully dark reminders of how our words and actions around children shape their beliefs and affect their lives in profound and often invisible ways.


L Extreme

L Extreme by JL Civi

A Love Extreme is the greatest double debut album you've probably never heard -- but really should! B is for Benji, an aspiring musician with a bad case of writer’s block and a love story he’s not allowed to tell (but does anyways). C is for Count, Benji’s roommate who wants to help him get his groove back. D is for DJ, C’s love interest who may or may not be D as in dead. E is for Evilon. (He’s the villain, if that wasn’t clear from his name
) F is for Frank, the strong silent neighbor down the hall. G is for genre, a difficult concept to apply here. Is it a) Comedy? b) Romance? c) Fairy Tale? d) Magical Realism? e) Faux Biography? f) Infomercial? g) Album-oriented Fan Fiction? Let’s go with
 H) All of the above! IJK are letters we’re skipping in this very absurd blurb. L is for
well, nobody really knows what L stands for. That’s part of the mystery that makes her extreme. M is for Mmmmmm, the title of a dreamy chapter near the midpoint. N is for Narrator. That’s me, your guide on this journey. Oh boy! Presenting Quarkle's ramshackle story the universe values with Xtreme youthful zest. (That rounds out our alphabet, but only scratches the surface of our wild tale.) L EXTREME: An original novel by JL Civi, based on the songs of Benji Hughes A novel based on an album is a book with a killer soundtrack.


Bonkpocalypse

Bonkpocalypse by L. A. Guettler

Bonk isn’t a normal cat. It’s glitchy, rusty, its eyes don’t match—and it’s only getting worse. Red Darkling, its owner and all-around space babe, is determined to find out what’s wrong. Red’s investigation takes her across the galaxy, from Chuck’s Tap to the Whore’s Knuckles, from Dr. Mn’s Vet Clinic and Oil Change Emporium to The Meaty Noodle. Along the way, she’s joined by a lounge lizard, a government assassin and her busty wife, and some suspiciously hospitable monks. Will Red uncover Bonk’s secret? Who is Todhunter Balzac? And will she ever get that damn FlinkBar jingle out of her head? Advance praise for Bonkpocalypse “It’s just the book I was looking for." ~The Serendipitous Teh “A powerful exploration of a young woman’s struggle to find her place in the galaxy.” ~Fritzi Giggler “More fun than a C’longi bachelor party.” ~Dirk Largo


The Scandinavian Aggressors

The Scandinavian Aggressors by Rowdy Geirsson

An offbeat odyssey into the freezing heart of the modern Northlands The Scandinavian Aggressors chronicles Rowdy Geirsson's tireless quest to uncover the secret history of the early 21st century's resurgence of authentic viking activity known as the Modern Viking Movement. Along the way he meets modern viking luminaries such as Trond "Troll-Breath" Trondsen, who successfully raided a historic monastery's gift shop in England; Björn Svensson, who habitually recited classic rock lyrics at the site of each of his infamous berserkings; and Ingrid Törnblom, who founded an elite warrior sisterhood that drew comparisons to the Spartans of ancient Greece, the Samurai of feudal Japan, and perhaps most flattering of all, the Jedi Knights of the Intergalactic Republic. Encounters with additional Neo-Norse individuals augment the journey, revealing long-hidden details about the slaying of a creepy troll in Beowulf's homeland, the brewing of craft beer from within pagan burial mounds, and the suffering of horrendous digestive problems amidst the breathtaking natural beauty of Iceland's remarkable landscape. Topical, informative, and highly insightful, The Scandinavian Aggressors not only provides essential reading for anyone with even a remote interest in the Modern Viking Movement, but also spins a darn good yarn about the fragility of the Scandinavian condition.


Why Odin Drinks

Why Odin Drinks by BjĂžrn Larssen

In the beginning there was confusion. Then Gods created people. Confusion was better. Well, have YOU ever woken up not knowing how to God properly? Poor Odin must restrain his brothers, who create offensive weapons such as mosquitoes and celery; placate his future-telling wife, Frigg, who demands sweatpants with pockets; listen to Loki’s Helpful Questions; hang himself from Yggdrasil for nine days with a spear through his side (as you do); teach everyone about nutritional values of kale (but NOT celery); meet a Wise Dom, Sir Daddy Mímir, in order to outwit those who outwit him; and, most importantly, prove he is The All-Father, while his brothers are, at best, Those-Uncles-We-Don’t-Talk-About. This nearly (except in Vanaheim) universally acclaimed retelling of the Gods’ first millennium answers way too many questions, including ones on Freyr’s entendre, horse designing
 and why Odin drinks. 'So, I loved it! Here's my quote: "Funny, quirky and surreal, this is the Norse myth you've been craving." Will it do?' – Joanne Harris, author of The Gospel of Loki and Chocolat Why Odin Drinks, a Norse Mythology retelling for fans of Terry Pratchett, Douglas Adams, Jenny Lawson, and Calvin & Hobbes is suitable for readers aged 14+. The book features no graphic descriptions, although some characters wish it would.


Am I Alone? John K

Am I Alone? John K by Stephanie Vlahos

John K hurtles to Mars. He is a chance hero - the first person to travel to Mars. Alone. in a space capsule, lonely in his reflections, yet he finds love. He contemplates Earth - a failing planet with a collapsing ecology. The beautiful green and blue which is fast disappearing. What does the future hold for John K. and all those he has left behind.


Blazing Coffins

Blazing Coffins by Jowsey Jones

Jowsey Jones is the newest comedy fantasy voice in town and he brings you a tumbling SFF farce with Blazing Coffins, the first in The Monster Twins series. Theda and Wolfie are The Monster Twins and boy, do they have their hands full in this madcap good vs evil romp with a mind-boggling cast of monstrosities. Sad sack Theda is woken from a horrible hex and finds there is more to life than drudgery in her uncle’s wonky funeral parlour. Something is tingling in her teeth, and wait
why has her dimwit hunk of a brother sprouted a tail? Before long, the twins are chasing around a bizarro America trying to save their parents from a lunatic sorcerer with pharaonic delusions. They face an army of crackpot enemies: a vampire haberdasher and his toothy cohort, bumbling claymen, and a beautiful, insatiable nightmare from the ancient Steppes. Even Santa gets a cameo, and he isn’t very nice at all. Thankfully, they have some monsters of their own to help: an old-school Frankencouple and a Green Man with his snippety eco-warrior wife. Plus a trio of cheerful dead people, the world’s worst paranormal investigator, and a lovelorn bogman in dire need of moisturiser. Welcome to a fearless frolic that sacrifices anything for a laugh. Get your giggles here with Blazing Coffins.


The Mystery Of The Murdered Guy

The Mystery Of The Murdered Guy by G.M. Nair

SFFOasis

After their very public triumph over the sinister machinations of the Future Group, Michael Duckett and Stephanie Dyer's accidental detective agency has become a household name. Practically overnight, they've cemented their place as the city's go-to sleuths for solving the weird, oddball cases that would confuse and irritate anyone else. Join them as they tackle the mysteries of a medically licensed vampire, a mysterious mad bomber, a genderfluid reverse werewolf, and the true meaning of Christmas - just to name a few. Meanwhile, an aging billionaire obsesses over his plans to achieve immortality, which could mean dire consequences for the world. But with Duckett & Dyer: Dicks For Hire on the case, what could go wrong? If you said 'everything', you'd be correct.


Before and After

Before and After by Andrew Shanahan

SPSFC

THE BEST-SELLING SCI-FI THRILLER THAT BLENDS HEALTHY LIVING AND LOTS OF DYING "A big fat five stars. This is a horror story. It's a visceral portrait of addiction and the hope of redemption in a world turned mad by hate and fear. The worst thing is that it is true. A must-read." Jane Almond-Deville, The British Obesity Society. Ben Stone is terrified. He's terrified because he weighs 601 pounds and needs his right leg amputating. He's terrified because a crane will shortly lift him from his fourth-floor flat and lower him 44 feet to an ambulance waiting below. He's terrified because he hasn't been outside in nine years and he doesn't know who will look after his beautiful dog. He needn't worry though, because the world is about to end.


Utopia PR

Utopia PR by Adam Bender

SPSFC 2022

Humor Book Winner in the 2021 IndieReader Discovery Awards A sci-fi satire about seeking work-life balance while doing public relations for an authoritarian president. PR extraordinaire Blake Hamner (the n is silent) put off his honeymoon for his big break: joining a major political campaign for president. Now, the "Hammer" struggles to make time for his marriage as Crisis Communications Manager for Our Leader, who since taking power has become increasingly mad and totalitarian. The Hammer starts to reconsider his career choices when one of Our Leader's savage steel hounds attacks the Comms team at a press conference. He'd love to talk about his erratic job with his wife, Triple-N news anchor Maria Worthington, but they have a rule: the broadcast journalist doesn't ask Blake for inside information about his work, and the spin doctor doesn't use their relationship as leverage on what Maria reports. They say you shouldn't keep things from each other in a marriage, but it's OK--the only secrets between Blake and Maria are professional. When a revolutionary levels grave allegations against Our Leader--and accuses Blake of distributing disinformation and propaganda to cover it up--the PR rep who thought he could talk his way out of any crisis finds himself utterly trapped in a dystopian job.


Excalibur Nights

Excalibur Nights by Daniel Aegan

SPFBO8

Excalibur Nights is just a book
 Or is it? What is Ralph supposed to know about fantasy books meant for young adults anyways? He’s an electrician by trade, and he’s way too old to be reading about princesses, castles, and centaurs. Who has time for that kind of nonsense in their lives when you have a job, an ex-wife, and bills to worry about? But then Abby came along, and ruined Ralph’s blissful ignorance. She introduced him to the book and movie series that changed his life. Her obsession leaked into their budding relationship. To make matter a hell of a lot worse, Ralph found himself magically transported to the fantasy world of Mariella. You read that last sentence right. Now Ralph is trapped inside the world of Excalibur Nights with no idea why and no way to get home. Does he go along with the story and try to woo Princess Abbie, the literary counterpart to the girlfriend he left behind in the real world? And what does he do about the love triangle between himself, the princess, and the centaur named Poe? He doesn’t know enough about the genre to untangle the mess of crisscrossing mythos, magic, and royal drama. Excalibur Nights by Daniel Aegan is an unapologetic fantasy that spins the fantasy genre on its head. Come on
 You know they had it coming!


Hell and High Water

Hell and High Water by Charlotte E. English

SPFBO8

Meet the baddest belles of London city. They were known as the fatales, once. Investigators and spies; killers and thieves; con artists and vigilantes — they fought fire with fire, did what had to be done, to make things right. Until the mission that broke them. Many decades later, the fatales have scattered to the winds. Fionn's the queen of London haute couture. Thetai's the star of the power metal scene. And Daix? Could be anything. Anywhere. It'll take a lot to bring them back together. When a model goes missing from a catwalk show, Fionn's frantic. The girl was a friend — and a fellow selkie. And she won't be the last to vanish. To catch the monster responsible, Fionn needs backup. It's time for the fatales to reunite, but can they get it together after eighty years apart? And will it be enough to face down an old enemy straight out of their murky, half-forgotten past? Three fabulous fae banter and brawl their way through a re-imagined, modern-day London — fighting crime, forging friendships and causing havoc. With style. Perfectly tailored for fans of urban fantasy and Charlie’s Angels!


The Lich of Thandorien

The Lich of Thandorien by Zak Dragon

SPFBO8

Old high school classmates and current drinking buddies, Phil and Don find themselves transported into a Crypts & Crusades role-playing adventure they had abandoned five years earlier. If that wasn't bad enough, it seems that some of the non-player characters, or Extra Dungeon Personalities (EDPs) as they now prefer to be called, have taken on a life of their own during the extended downtime and have veered away from the normal script. Fortunately for the daring duo, there is plenty of beer and they manage to get a little help along the way from an inquisitive but emotional ranger, a home-brewing, pub-owning dwarf and his ogre bartender, a grumpy old gardener and a host of other colorful characters. But will it be enough to defeat the crypt's antagonist, locate a powerful relic and get out alive?


Blazing Coffins

Blazing Coffins by Jowsey Jones

SPFBO8

BLAZING COFFINS: A FANTASY FARCE Monster Twins Theda and Wolfie chase around a bizarro America trying to save their parents from a lunatic sorcerer with pharaonic delusions. They face an army of crackpot enemies: a vampire haberdasher and his toothy cohort, bumbling claymen, and a beautiful, insatiable nightmare from the ancient Steppes. Even Santa gets a cameo, and he isn’t very nice at all. Thankfully, they have some monsters of their own to help: an old-school Frankencouple and a Green Man with his snippety eco-warrior wife. Plus a trio of cheerful dead people, the world’s worst paranormal investigator, and a lovelorn bogman in dire need of moisturiser. Jowsey Jones is the newest comedy fantasy voice in town and he brings you a tumbling SFF farce with Blazing Coffins, the first in TheMonster Twins series. Welcome to a fearless frolic that sacrifices anything for a laugh. Get your giggles here with Blazing Coffins.


Growth & Change Are Highly Overrated

Growth & Change Are Highly Overrated by Tom Starita

Growth and Change Are Highly Overrated is a twist on the classic coming-of-age story that takes a unique and comic look at what we all fear— having to grow up and abandon our dreams. For a charismatic man like Lucas James, life is a breeze because everyone else provides the wind. This adolescent front man for a mediocre cover band has been mooching off of his fiancĂ©e, Jackie, for years until she finally decides she's had enough. Faced with reality and having no income to support his carefree lifestyle, Lucas James abandons his principles and gets a job working in the stockroom at “That Store.” How does he cope with this newfound sense of responsibility? He casually steals... After a life spent bucking authority, how will Lucas James deal with his manager, 'Victor the Dictator'? How long can he tolerate Ralph, a starry-eyed coworker who desires nothing more than to be best friends? Will Lori, a twenty-something cashier, be like everyone else and fall for his charms? Will he ever find a place to live? And is “growing up” just another way of saying “selling out”?


The Universal Good Deal

The Universal Good Deal by Cleophas Foy

Alien white people from outer-space invade Earth armed with amazing deals and low, low prices. They're selling lava lamps, fanny packs, water beds, and more and everyone's buying it. Wouldn't you? It's from outer-space! Made by Aliens! And everything's on sale. It's a steal. But the Aliens only take cash. It's up to a marketing genius, a bosomy politician, and a genuinely nice guy to figure out what the Aliens want before we all become the product. Can humanity survive the most effective advertising campaign ever created or will the Aliens make a real killing? The Universal Good Deal is a satire about colonialism that explores all the horrible ways people fail to understand those who are different from them.


The Fantastically Underwhelming Epic

The Fantastically Underwhelming Epic by Kian N. Ardalan

SFFOasis SPFBO8

George is a legendary hero...wait, no. George is an incredibly powerful sorcerer...also no? Okay, fine. George is an unremarkable human bard who made a promise a long time ago. A promise that set him on a path to find the remains of Simantiar, the greatest wizard who ever lived. Though all that was left were bones, Simantiar was still very much alive and quite...underwhelming. This is their story: The Fantastically Underwhelming Epic of a dead wizard and an average bard.


Little Drummer Boy: A Darkly Humorous Paranormal Holiday Short (Hemlock Connal Book 2)

Little Drummer Boy: A Darkly Humorous Paranormal Holiday Short (Hemlock Connal Book 2) by Joel Spriggs

SFFOasis

A darkly humorous paranormal Christmas short! Boston’s strangest private investigator, Hemlock Connal, is back! Along with her longest surviving intern, Morgan Burns. When a demonic drummer boy walks down their road leading a small team of zombies, the detective duo take a much needed break from a boring financial case. As they follow the horned drummer from Boston to the middle of nowhere, they find the zombie squad has more secrets than just marching through the night. Hemlock and Morgan get led through a dark journey of black market organ theft, drug sorting undead, all leading up to meeting the big man himself. Confronted with the ultimate arbiter of the holiday season, will Hemlock and Morgan survive the test of naughty or nice? Find out, in Little Drummer Boy!


Over a God's Dead Body: A Supernatural Comedy (Wrong Gods Book 1)

Over a God's Dead Body: A Supernatural Comedy (Wrong Gods Book 1) by Joel Spriggs

SFFOasis

"It's an offbeat comedy in the vein of American Gods" In the same style of humor as Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, you'll find the Norse gods and characters hilarious. If you are looking for a humorous adult version of the Magnus Chase series, you'll be laughing at how Esmy and Jake deal with Loki. Esmy is frustrated by a lack of pockets on women's pants. Living with her librarian brother Jake in a small Indiana town and working at a private college, Esmy feels like she is is stuck in a rut. Meeting Loki ignites their lives like a powder-keg. This simple, seemingly innocuous encounter leads Esmy and Jake to discover the campus's mysterious depths, involving sasquatches, vampires, and much more with the supernatural, magical and paranormal. In a crudely comedic high-stakes game of maneuvering, Loki's freedom and Esmy's survival come down to a fight over a God's dead body. Will Esmy become a reluctant hero? Is Jake a lucky novice necromancer? Will Loki actually become a half-decent mentor? If you like insane action, hilarious dialogue, and gods behaving badly, then you'll love the first installment in Joel Spriggs's series of magical realism and whimsical mythology.


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